the news.

i've officially decided to stay away from the news. watching it, reading it, seeing what's on my yahoo homepage. all of it.

now, i know this may sound like i'm choosing to be an ignorant, uninformed young person (like so many of us are). but i don't see it that way. i'm not boycotting information, i'm boycotting the way the media presents information.

i'm tired of clicking on a seemingly happy story about a child who is cured from an illness only to see a link at the bottom of the page suggesting i would be 'interested' in a story about an abused child or a murder victim. i watch 45 minutes of gang violence, animal abuse and arson before i get to the one happy story the anchor promised me at the top of the hour.

and you know what, it doesn't make me feel more informed. it doesn't make me feel like a more responsible adult. i know that there are crappy people in this world who do crappy things. i know that. i know to be safe in my surroundings and  use common sense. and i guess that's about as informed as i need to be. but all the news does is bad-mouth the world we live in. and we can't move to another one, so what are we supposed to do about it? if i had a friend that spent all day pointing out hubby's faults, i wouldn't continue to hang out with that (presumably bitter) friend. so i'm off to make breakfast and prepare for filling my now empty noon hour (which will no longer be used to watch tragedy) with thrifting and cartoons.

happy monday.

instax pix from hookie day!

i'm starting out this week by being thankful/excited about:

*playing school hookie last thursday and spending a day with my mom and sister. bowling, eating, roller coasters, beach, ice cream. most perfect day ever.
*FINALLY finding the velvet underground album that i've been looking for since 2009 AND only spending $8 on it.
*the rackets and totally 90'2 (i'm talking magenta and teal blue here, people) duffel bag for a dollar a piece at the thrift store so hubby and i can play racketball together. excercise, fun, and quality time? sign me up.
*fresh&easy. period. more specifically though, their delicious fruit, healthy dinner options and apple slices. i love apples. but because of some old dental work, i am terrified to bite into one. i've tried pre-sliced apples in the past only to throw entire bags away because of the chemically gross taste. fresh&easy apple slices are just superior to everything and don't have that taste. who knows how they do it?
*$5 movie ticket sundays and entertainment books that allow for hubby and i to have fabulous weekends at graduate school prices.
*the zombie and dinosaur cross stitch patterns i found online this weekend to use to liven up our home and enjoy one of my favorite past times.

partay.

probably every on the planet reads this blog, and rightfully so. i went to high school with the author, and she's just the cutest. and she had this great idea to start off the week by posting about the things in your life that make you happy and that are going well.

what a great idea. and since the theme of this whole blog is making the best of every situation you're in, i thought it was very fitting.

awesomeness of my life, 4th of july edition:
*fourth of july fireworks! i seriously wait all year for these bad boys. and with a view of disneyland from the roof, watch out!
*bbq's with friends (even if it takes him half an hour to get the grill going)
*finally finding the pool key to our apartment pool and cooling off in the most fun way for hours this last weekend
*a national holiday that gives me and the hubby and extra day off to spend together
*the yellow tennis shoes i got for work
*the newspaper print nail design i just learned how to do
*the creampuffs in the freezer, counting down their last few hours
(those last few weren't 4th of july-ish, but they seemed worth mentioning).

want s'more?

last night hubby and i really wanted to embrace the california summer that is upon us. after work, we went roller skating in the park, ate grilled burgers and played board games outside (while the sun shined past eight o'clock!) and made the most perfect summer time desserts.

as someone who has dreaded summer in the past- to the point of tears on some hot, sticky days- i'm really enjoying embracing it. especially if it means i get marshmallows and chocolate bars.

masons.

http://marvinatorsplace.blogspot.com/2011/06/mason-jars-as-drinking-glasses.html

 
me: isn't it just the cutest thing when people drink out of mason jars at weddings and restaurants and stuff?
hubby: yeah.

http://www.hostessblog.com/2009/02/sipping-in-style-clever-barware/

me: i wish WE could have mason jar cups.....*sigh*
hubby: why can't we?
me: um....because....uh...

SO today I went out in search of mason jars. and they were cheaper than anticipated. and we had a lovely summer dinner with lovely summer glassware at a private dinner party- for two.

Happy Summer, Guys!

wishing.

i rarely ever enter contests or raffles. i usually get too excited at the prospect of winning for my own good.


but wouldn't this just be fantastic??
http://ohhappyday.com/2011/06/goes-to-paris/

inspired.

yesterday was the most creative day i've had in a long time. i got some great home decor items from the thrift store and i have some pretty cute plans in store.

let's just hope they come out as cute as they are in my head.

cleaning up my act.

tomorrow will be my first official day of summer break. i'm so excited i can't stand it. and not just because the semester is over and i have time to relax, but because i have time to make some important improvements in my life.

this week is going to be about cleaning up. i'm going to clean out my desk, organize all my school and clinic materials that swallowed our apartment, and scrub every appliance and surface we have 'till our entire home sparkles like a cartoon.

i'm also going to be cleaning up what i eat. i've been interested in eating healthier for a while, and with summer here it seems like the perfect time. i read a book about what's called "eating clean" and i'm really excited to get started with it. the general principle is very simple- eat natural things because they are better for you. duh. i'm not going 100% clean right away for a couple reasons- 1. i cannot find "clean" approved english muffins. and i like those and 2. i really want to use what i can of what's already in the kitchen before i rush out and buy more food. for now my goal is to eat get about 70-80% of my daily calories from clean foods (fruits, veggies, nut, lentils/legume, whole grains, lean protein).

i know i have a lot of really unhealthy eating habits and i know it impacts my energy levels, my emotions, even my skin complexion in addition to my weight. plus, i'm just thrilled at the thought of spending the summer by the pool noshing on peach slices and cucumber salads! yum!

peanut butter.

for the first two years of our marriage, hubby and i kept creamy peanut butter stocked in the house. i don't know who bought that first jar of creamy. we never talked about it. we never talked about the peanut butter at all except to let the next one to the grocery store know we were out.

one day, hubby goes to make a pb&j and he looks over his shoulder at me and says oh-so-matter-of-factly, 'i wish you liked chunky. i miss it.'

to which i flabbergastedly, and quickly, replied 'what are you talking about? i've only been buying the creamy for you. i love chunky. chunkier the better.'

lesson learned: you always must communicate because even the littlest things shouldn't be assumed. also learned: hubby and i are even more compatible now than when we first got married. how sweet.

finals.

finals are slowly killing me. i am exhausted, nervous, and full-brained. when did cumulative finals become so popular?

the only tidbit getting me through any of this (besides the two to three lattes a day) is the knowledge that in twelve short months, i will be done with school and out in the real world making a difference in people's lives and helping those who really need it.

this morning i took a study break/forgot to ask for the weekend off and manned my work's booth at the special olympics. at first, i was annoyed at getting up early and loosing five study hours. but it was so inspiring- not only the athletes who have worked so hard to succeed in their chosen sports, but the family members who dedicate so much time, energy and love to get them there. i'm really glad i was able to experience that. i can't wait to be part of that team to help people reach their dreams. it makes the study hours a lot more bearable and meaningful.

which is good because i've already read two hundred more pages than i thought i could, and i have even more to go.

bangs rule.

the single greatest hair decision i ever made was cutting me some bangs. they are amazing, and here's why.

1. forehead breakouts are no match for me! as a grad student, i get stressed. stress causes break outs. and my forehead usually takes the brunt of the attack. who cares cause you cant see it anyway.

2. building off point one, i save make up time when i need to. so, im running late and i dont have time torub some foundation on my forehead. nobody cares.

3.saves time on hair- no matter how giant of a poof i ball the rest of my hair into, if i straighten out my bangs, it looks like im rocking an actual hair style. this works super well when i have to look professional in the clinic, but forgot to wash my hair.

4. perfect style for vintage fashions. perfect style for causal fashions. perfect style for business fashions. perfect for when i'm going rocker chic; girlie-girl, teacherly, sweet or spunky. the list goes on. i never really have to worry about 'how to wear my hair' with an outfit  'cause the bangs do most of the work.

5. eyebrow tweezing is a thing of the past. which is sad, but if i need to buy an extra ten sleeping minutes during finals, i'm going to cut every corner i can.

6. i basically want to be zooey deschanel. this is a start.

greek.

last week was spring break for me. hubby took time off from work so we could spend time together. we ended up adding this show "greek" to our netflix cue and watched all seventy four episodes in a week. it was a lot of fun.

the show was okay. a bit cheesy and predictable. and it made me want to gag sometimes when the most serious drama was who became president of their sorority or the fact that the fact one girl rigged judging on a talent show was considered on the same level as someone else burning her house down. but it was lighthearted, for the most part, and entertaining.

and then it was over and i bawled my eyes out. not because the show was over, but because it struck so many cords in me that i didn't even know i had.

i didn't get to have the normal college experience on any level. i went there to be close to hubby, so i wasn't sure if it was really the right school for me. paying for it was a burden so i had to work almost full time to make it through. i did the whole roommate thing freshman year but none of us had anything in common so i ended up going home to see my mom a lot on weekends and then got married sophomore year. i picked a difficult major that left no time to form any good friendships, with the exception of one, but i didn't meet emily until our last few semesters. it was a commuter school so it was really difficult to find ways to get involved. so i graduated early and didn't look back.

now i go to another commuter school. in the same hard major made more difficult by the fact that it's graduate level. and it's two hours away from my house so even if there was time to hang out, there wouldn't be time to commute. plus, that's a lot of gas.

i wish i could go back. i wish it could be different. i wish i had a more well rounded college experience. but i can't.

what i can do is learn from it. and from spending three hours crying my eyes out last night, i learned that i want to live in the present as much as i can. i've spent my whole life working towards the next thing that i keep missing the things i already have. and some of them i can never have again.

this is my last year of graduate school. senior year 2.0, if you will. and i want to make it count. i want to have a good time. make new friends. maybe join a club (that meets on a day i already have class because seriously, who would drive two hours for a club?) i want to have a college experience i can look back on with pride and nostalgia. not just think of it as those six years between high school and a career.

and i've learned to watch out for corny tv shows about characters in my own age demographic. i should watch at my own risk.

last night.

last night, hubby and i played hide-and-go-seek with our two kitties for an hour. and our kitties won every round. sometimes, i just really love my life.

day fourteen.

day fourteen- post a picture of your family

i don't have just one picture that encompasses my whole family. so prepare for a photo overload.

 

 the family i was born into, the family i picked, and the furry family we adopted. <3

half way.

the semester if halfway over this week. yay. guess what else is half over? my stint in graduate school. two and half semesters down, two and half more to go. although, in all fairness- the first two and a half were waaaaay worse than the last two and half are going to be.

after this semester, i only have one academic class left. everything else is clinical hours and a giant exam. and i'm getting pretty antsy. i explained to hubby that this entire semester makes me feel like a kid on december 20th.

when hubby and i were first engaged, i couldn't sleep for a week. i thought i would spend the entire engagement awake because i was so filled with anticipation, sleep was impossible. that's exactly how i feel  right now. every time i wake up, i'm one day closer to finishing this journey and starting a new one that i've been looking forward to for so long.

now i just have to make sure it lives up to the hype.

day thirteen.

i'm super behind on this so i may do two today. i kinda suck at this.

day 13- your 5 favorite books and why
1. Please Kill Me- this book is the history of the punk movement. growing up, my parents taught me how to really appreciate bands and how a musician's life impacts the music he or she makes. it made me feel like i was part of the scene that i've always loved.
2. Portable Dorothy Parker- she's just so witty and cool. it's short stories and poems by her so it's easy to read one or two between classes. im reading it for the second time now.
3. Pride and Prejudice- jane austen will probable always be my favorite author. this book is so romantic and compelling and satirical and empowering and beautifully written. i believe i've read it six times. (seven if you count number 4)
4. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies- epic. it's jane austen's masterpiece. but phrases like "find a husband" have been replaced with "hunt a zombie." it combines two of my favorite things- favorite book and favorite paranormal monster. win.
5. The CDS Student Survival Guide- if anyone happens upon this blog because they googled "speech pathology grad student + crazy life + how the heck do i get through this", today is your lucky day. buy this book. it's published by the student chapter of the national organization (NSSLHA). i bought it when i was just at my wits end with school. i was crying daily because i constantly felt overwhelmed and like i was failing. i honest thought i was going to flunk out last summer (never mind the 4.0 on my transcript that should have indicated otherwise- i was freaked). this book has tips for getting through tough clinic cases, time management, step by step directions for what you should be doing each semester as you get closer to comps and looking for a job. and, best of all, reminds us that we aren't alone. hundreds of other people are in the exact same spot we're in. and if they can do it, we certainly can.

day twelve

day 12- write a poem to someone you love


harley barley pudding pie
you are the apple of your mamma's eye.
she needed a friend cause she was feeling blue
lucky she went to the shelter and found you.
when she is sad or feels like crying
you perk her right up, without even trying.
she loves when you sleep on her pillow at night
and lick her hand and her face and her feet, alright!
you're mamma's little buddy from here on out
and she's not too sure how she ever did without!

yes, i wrote a poem to my cat. no, i don't care how wierd/creepy/cat-ladyish that is.

hubby and i got our first cat in 2008. she is a beautiful, fluffy, all-black cat we got from to oc animal shelter. and she loves hubby. i mean, she likes me too. but he is HER human. she'll barely let me pet her but he holds her for hours and she just purrs and purrs.

well, towards the end of last summer, i was in a pretty bad place. i was about ready to quit school because my clinic supervisor was running me to the ground and i honestly thought i was going to flunk out anyway. i was jealous of all of my high school friends starting their careers while i still had another degree to get through. my cousin was pregnant, and all i've wanted for the last two years was to be able to have a baby (although we are purposefully waiting until i'm done with school, i cannot wait to be a mommy). hubby got an awesome promotion and my commute became permamnent. our house was messy and ugly and i just felt like crawling in a cave in the fetal position and waiting for death.

and then one day- july 25, 2010- i just felt it in my heart to go to the animal shelter where we got our first cat. we hadn't really discussed getting another cat, but i just knew i needed to go. i did, and they were closed. so i went back as soon as they opened the next day. while all the kittens were adorable, none of them seemed right for me. i was about ready to go home when i noticed another room of kittens. half the room was empty. there were only about four kittens inside. and there, at the very end of the row, in the very top cage, was this tiny white kitten with a black mask. as soon as we made eye contact, she rolled over and started purring. i put my hand in. she placed her paw on my hand and started licking it. the volunteer said she wouldn't be ready for adoption until the next morning. i stayed with her for an hour without even being able to take her out of the cage.

the next morning, i went back again, with hubby. he fell in love, too and we adopted her. and now, i am HER human. she sleeps on my pillow, hangs out in the kitchen when i cook, lays next to me on the couch, and sits in my lap when i'm on the computer.

i do still get frustrated trying to get through school and watching everyone around me (seemlingly) surpase me in life, but i can do nothing but smile when that kitten is lying by me on the couch, on her back, with her head in my lap. i still get a little teary sometimes when i think about how thankful i am that God put it in my heart to go to the pound that day and find her- my little kitten soulmate.

don't even pretend like you don't love her, too.

camera love.

fact- i love polaroids. who doesn't?
fact- i was devastated when i found my mom's old camera in the garage only to discover the film was no longer being made and cost an arm and a leg.
fact- i found out about the instax mini/polaroid 300 cameras and felt a glimmer of hope in a meaningless world.
fact- i decided the hundred buck price tag was a tad too rich for my blood. when you consider the price of film and all the jazz, it just seemed out of reach for a while.
fact- goodwill has a website where you can shop online, ebay style.
fact- some loser totally donated their polaroid 300 camera! sucka!
fact- it is an amatuer mistake to make your max bid end in a 0.00- i.e. 20.00, 30.00 etc.
fact- i won the puppy with a bid of 21.00.
fact- camera arrived today.
fact- with a giant smile and butterflies in my tummy, i drove as fast as i could to target to get film to see if the camera works.
fact- the camera works.
fact- i am in love with it! already preparing a wall to be dedicated to my instant pics!!

that is cat hair as the camera is resting on a kitty condo. not human hair- i'm not a disgusting pig person.

day eleven.

day 11- write a bucket list of things you want to do before you die

this will be short and sweet: have babies, bye a house and make it adorable, work in a skilled nursing home and wear vintage dresses to work daily, go to europe, see the pyramids, take a road trip across the us, and possibly- many, many moons from now- earn a ph.d. i'm not a very adventurous person and have no desire to leap off things, jump into anything with a riptide or climb anything higher than the ladder to the top of the ferris wheel at the county fair.

i do, however, constantly think about what the wizard tells the tin man at the end of the wizard of oz: "a heart is not judged by by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others." at the end of my road, i just want to know in my heart i did all i could to bring love into the world and that i shared it with everyone around me.

http://ideologystop.net/Wizard_of_Oz_2.htm

i'd maybe also want to punch a shark. just for the cool story. and i'd get mad respect from my future kids and grandkids.

day ten.

day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad

i've kinda been avoiding this post on purpose. thing is, if i'm honest it's gonna sound like a cop out.


 basically, i listen to all my favorite music all the time. if i'm happy, i like my favorite music. if i'm sad, i listen to my favorite tunes to perk me up. if i'm bored, i like my favorite music and also dancing to it or trying to figure out how to play it on the bass. if i'm hyped, i listen to the same music but louder, and maybe i scream the words along with the band. if i'm mad- i don't like to listen to music then. i just want to be alone. and when the music's on, i don't feel like i'm all by myself.


so, i'm going to kind of alter the task for today.

every so often, there are songs that i just absolutely crave. worse than any chocolate or coffee craving. i feel like nothing can go on until i listen to that song. if i have to request it on the radio, fidget with my ipod, burrow through the depths of the center console trying unmarked cd after unmarked cd, or (in times of severe desperation) log onto youtube from my smart phone. yes, i have done this while driving BUT i never WATCH the videos, i just need to hear the songs.


so here the are in no particular order: my heroin songs (note:the song "heroin" is not one of them. but "sweet jane" also by the velvet underground, is.).


1. blitzkrieg bop- the ramones. i feel  like everyone in the world knows this song, and if you don't my heart literally aches for you. or you're amish. and that's cool.


2. sweet jane- velvet underground. it's just awesome. the velvets are awesome. just love it.


3. my own worst enemy- lit. takes me back to middle school every time i hear. and it's still cool. also, fun at karaoke bars.


4. josie- blink 182. see above. also, it's hubby and my song 'cause we love blink and cause it's not sappy and 'cause we're from san diego and ate at sombrero's all the time. we want to name our daughter josie.


5. guns of brixton- the clash. political dissatisfaction, paranoia, ska beats, awesome bass line, synthasizer, and paul simonon singing. what's not love?

future.

i've been trying to get more excited about the future lately. it can be really hard to keep motivated for things like school and work when it feels like your life is going nowhere. my cousin, who i'm very close to, became a mommy this week. and while i'm very happy for her, it's a bit of a bummer when the most exciting thing i've done this week is read about hearing loss. to cheer me up, hubby took me out yesterday to the town i want to live in after grad school. it was nice to just explore that community and imagine living there. it was a little vacation for my thoughts.

today, when i went for a walk to the store, i saw this perfect picture. and i bought it. it was frivolous and i don't need it right now- there is nowhere to put it and it doesn't quite go with the style of our apartment. but it is the epitome of how i want our house to look when we buy one. so i bought it as sort of proof to myself that i will be there. eventually.

day nine.

day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days

i know it may seem like everything i post around here has to do with school or my future job or something. but this one was a no brainer for me. in the last few days, i've been very proud of my future profession, especially since the (amazing) film, "the king's speech" is everywhere.

picture from imdb.com

the movie is amazing. for one, when's the last time there was a movie about a speech therapist? and two, this is one of the first times in a movie where a stutter is accurately depicted, and not used to imply the character is dumb, evil, or anything other than a person with a difficult time talking.

i'm proud to be going into this field and to hopefully, help others in a way that has a significant impact on their lives.

day eight.

day 8- short term goals for this month and why

making goals in grad school feels like a waste. i always have a million things i'm going to do "after i study" or "after this paper is done." problem is, after i study, there is more studying to do. so my goal for the month is basically just to cross some non-school related things off my to do list.

i'd like to work out more- it's healthy and will boost my energy.

i'd like to stay within my weight watchers points- cause i wanna drop some lbs and cause i paid for it. mostly cause i paid for it.

i'd like to learn a song on the bass hubby got for me when i was on winter break and that i haven't touched since school went back in session.

i'd like to be a better wife- cook more, clean more, and spend more time hanging with the hubs.

and i'd like to get a's on all of my assignments. but that is not a this month goal. that's an always goal.

day seven.

day 7- a picture of someone/something that has had the biggest impact on you

this is a tough one. how do i pick one thing that's had the biggest impact? every person and every experience has lead me on a journey that made me who i am today.


but i'm going to go with:

picture from the westwood college website.

after our freshman years (mine and his, not doing it twice) hubby decided he did not want to continue at the four year school in san diego he was attending. he spoke to his parents and decided to go to westwood college, with a location in anaheim. this meant he was going to move. i had to make a decision: would i stay at my school or transfer to orange county to be with him?

i decided to transfer. but at the last second, hubby couldn't go to westwood. so i moved to anaheim and he stayed in san diego. we were long distance for a semester. and just when we were about to crack from the strain of a long distance relationship, he decided to move to orange county, too- school or no school. we spent the next semester hanging out, going to disneyland constantly, and spending every free second with each other. he got a part time job at a movie theatre (that he hated) and took classes part time at the community college. it was so fun and so exciting, he asked me to marry him. i accepted. duh.

the reason, though, that he wanted to move to the oc for school was that his dream company, the one that he had wanted to work for since he was in the eighth grade, was in the oc. he hated his job, so i knew i had to help him. i sent his resume in for him. and he got the job. the same week he started there, i attended the club fair on campus and met a nice professor, from whom i heard the words "speech-language pathology" from for the first time.

so even though hubby did not attend that college, from it:
-he got his dream job
-i got into the perfect major for me (which was not available at my first college)
-we spent a semester apart (which stinks) that solidified in our minds, and hearts, how much we were meant to be together.
-we moved out of our parents houses and saw that we could do it on our own, proving we could handle being married. if we still lived at home, we probably wouldn't even be married right now
-we started our own life in a city away from every one else we know. we got to make our own path, rely on each other, and be exactly who we want to be.

thanks, westwood college.

day six.

day 6- favorite super hero and why
batman. i like the darkness of gotham city. it's not the all american apple pie place a lot of other comics live in. and i like that he has no super-powers. everything he can do, he created or figured out for himself.
also, christian bale as the dark knight is super yummy.

oh la la...

watching weight.

i started using weight watchers online two weeks ago to try and shed about ten to fifteen pounds before swimsuit season. so far, i really like it. i don't feel like there is anything i CAN'T have, just that sometimes i have to choose between two yummies that i would want to eat.

i've been packing a lunch to take to school everyday, so i'm doing well for about three fourths of my day. the problem starts when i get home. most of the dinners i used to make take up almost a third of the amount of fat/calories/etc. that i'm supposed to eat in a day. and it's hard because with school and work, i usually don't have a whole lot of time to cook and clean at the end of the day.

so i need help. anyone out there have any super yummy, super easy to make dinners that are ALSO healthy/low fat and calories? preferably that only requires one pan- cause that's usually how many are clean at a time in this house.

day five.

day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been

well, i haven't been to a lot of places, so i'll share a few.

as a kid, my family and i used to drive from san diego to kerville, texas every summer to visit my grandmother.

 

 

this is kerrville. yep.

when grandma got a little older in years, she moved out to california to be near my family, so we started vacationing near palm springs in a city called cathedral city.

it was super beautiful. but we went in august so we never left the hotel pool/spa/restaurants. 

after my dad passed away, we didn't really do any more vacations. my next trip was for school. i was selected for some honor roll thingy and it included a trip to chi-town.

then i finished high school, started college, and didn't take another trip till hubby and i honeymooned.

we spent about in week in san fransisco. super fun!

for our year anniversary/hubby got a bonus and i really needed a vacation from school trip, we went to hawaii. which was better than i expected and i can't wait till we go back!

this was the view from our room. this is also when i started taking an interest in photography. even though i still had a horrible camera.

and then, of course, i've been to vegas. cause i'm a twenty something college student and i'm pretty sure a weekend in sin city is a general ed requirement.

so that's all the places i've been. texas, plam springs, chicago, san fransisco, hawaii and nevada. oh! and stars hollow, connecticut.

j/k. it's really in burbank but i still think it's cool!

day four.

day 4- a habit that you wish you didn’t have
worry. i worry and overplan to the point of insanity. i'm worried about money, health, losing weight, cleaning, school stuff. this year, we got a giant tax return and i worried about what to do with it. pay off this credit card, get this done to the car, go to summer school, etc. i gotta cool it sometimes.

some days.

some days are just harder than others.

some days i spend all my break time in the bathroom crying and trying to think of any excuse i could give my supervisor and professors that would allow me to go straight home.

some days i know i can do it, but i don't know that i want to. 

some days i have to set small goals in order to prove to myself this day will eventually end. if i can make it twelve i can make it to two. if i can make it to two, i can make it to four. if i make it through my four o'clock client, i can do my paperwork and go home.

today is one of these days. and i still have six and a half hours to go....

aNOTchronism.

for a long time in my life, i described myself as an anachronism- something in the wrong time. all of my favorite fashions, hairstyles, music, pop culture icons, are from the 1960's and 1970's. that, of course, is where i was meant to live me life.

but this past week, i finished reading "please kill me" which is the history of punk rock, told in interviews of people who were there from when it started in the early 60's to when it died in the 70's. and i learned something interesting. the mods hated the punks who hated the hippies who hated the 'rock' crowd. violent physical altercations occurred when mod kids would walk past punk clubs. or if a musician in a leather jacket walked near the hippie part of town. they purposefully sold each other bad drugs and stole from each other.

how would i chose? i love mod clothes, punk AND rock music, hippie ideals. and to think i would have had to chose!

so now i know i was, in fact, born in the perfect decade for me. i can listen to whatever i want, wear whatever i want, believe whatever i want and no one facet of my being must be defined by any other part. i am even more blessed than previously thought.

if only i didn't have to also put up with rap.....

p.s. the book was great! a bit vulgar, as is expected considering the subject matter, but highly recommended to anyone who truly appreciates music that means something and the people who make it.

day three.

day 3- a picture of you as a child

i don't have a lot of pictures of me as a child. but i'm really glad i have this one. my daddy was my best friend and my biggest fan. he passed away when i was in high school, but this picture is the perfect representation of our relationship. <3

day two.

day 2- the meaning behind your blog name
whenever hubby thinks i'm doing something adorable, he always chuckles and calls me "ridiculous." at first, i was offended but after seven years i've learned it's his term of endearment. i knew i wanted to incorporate it into my blog title. then i found the marilyn quote on my banner and was blown away. so true. and so absolutely ridiculous was born. also, its a bit of a through back to Ab Fab. if you didnt watch it, you prolly wont be my friend.

day one.

yesterday, i stumbled upon a thirty day blog activity. today is day one:

day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

New Year's 2011. Pretty wasted.

1. I married my high school sweetheart :) we started dating our sophomore year and got married 4 years later (when we were both 20!)
 

2. i'm a geek. i admit it. i play world of warcraft and go to convensions and yell at the spiderman movies when there's something even just a bit off from the comic.
 

3. everyone assumes i'm a teeny bopper based on my personality and how i dress and stuff. in reality, my favorite bands are the ramones, led zeppelin, and ac dc.
 

4. about point 3, when i was a kid, my allowance was based solely on my ability to name songs, bands, and/or facts. we'd be driving in the car and my mom would say "who sings this?" and i'd answer. then my dad would through in "what's the name of their drummer?" at the time, i found it really annoying. now, i'm really glad they instilled this love of rock and roll in me.

5. when i was a kid, i used to roller skate all the time. my best friends dad/ dad's best friend (cool) owned a rink and i spent every weekend of junior high there. because of this I broke my hands multiple times and have an awkardly sticking out pinky that makes me rock at guitar hero.
 

6.i am the only non-shunned member of my family to move away from san diego.
 

7. my checks have "the nightmare before christmas" pictures on them
 

8. everyone of my favorite pieces of clothing came from the thrift store or a merch stand. with the exception of two pairs of jeans from ross (which may as well be a thrift store)
 

9. i've worn the same pair of converse since i wass 13. that's ten years now. 

10. i changed my major in college 6 times, and still graduated early.
 

11. i mix every bit of make up i put on. i use two foundations, two lipsticks, two blushes, two eyeshadows and liner, two mascaras, etc. sometimes, i can't pick between the two,and other times it just feels nice to know nobody else is wearing exactly what you're wearing.
 

12. when i listen to a cd or an ipod, i try to guess how many other people in the world are listening to that same song right when i am. weird to think about.
 

13. i'm a tad morbid. when i used to say my prayers at night as a kid, i always ended with "and please don't let a demon posses my body and make me kill my family. Amen." It's subsided a bit. But to this day, hubby will call and say "I have a bit of bad news" and my mind immediately jumps to him having an affair, us having to hide a body, he finally tried heroin and is going to devote the rest of his life to looking for junk. Usually, though, he just has to work late.
 

14. I wear the same nail polish for a month. I touch it up and reapply as needed, but i use the same color for a month.
 

15.hubby and i treat our kittens like our babies. they're just so cute and easy to cuddle.

thirty days.

today, i stumbled onto a blog, lovers in a dangerous time, and found this list:

day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
day 2- the meaning behind your blog name
day 3- a picture of you as a child
day 4- a habit that you wish you didn’t have
day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been
day 6- favorite super hero and why
day 7- a picture of someone/something that has had the biggest impact on you
day 8- short term goals for this month and why
day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days
day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
day 11- write a bucket list of things you want to do before you die
day 12- write a poem to someone you love
day 13- your 5 favorite books and why
day 14- a picture of you and your family
day 15- put your ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play
day 16- a picture of yourself
day 17- someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why
day 18- plans/dreams/goals you have
day 19- write about a sweet memory from your past
day 20- write a letter to someone
day 21-a picture of something that makes you happy
day 22- what makes you different from everyone else
day 23- something you crave a lot
day 24- post your favorite quote or verse of scripture and why
day 25- what I would find in your bag
day 26- list 10 things that you are thankful for
day 27- my day job verses my passion
day 28- cruise a thesaurus and pick out 10 words you like the sound of
day 29 - favorite tv shows and why you like them
day 30 - movies you can watch again and again.

sounds fun! i'll be starting with day one tomorrow. stay tuned...

this weekend, in more detail.

friday, i sold an old coach bag on ebay and used the winnings to join weight watchers for three months. i just wanna drop a few pounds, so i'm excited to see how it works. some words of wisdom, though: do not join weight watchers before you go to vegas for the weekend. i ate like twelve million points.

saturday, i was supposed to go to the dentist. i arrived ten minutes early only to find they had no record of my appointment. i should them the little card thingy they sent me as a reminder. didn't matter. the dentist had already gone home for the day. moral of the story: those stupid appointment cards are really just a dental conspiracy to kill more trees.

sunday, hubby and i picked up some road food and headed to vegas (and i totally conned him into buying me a ramones cd i didn't already have. score!). the company he works for paid for everyone at his level and higher (managers, developers, etc.) to go to the palms for two nights. sunday, we drank. he drank a lot. i had one drink and then took care of him. it was nice. i won three dollars playing penny slots.

monday, we had to take a shuttle full of retirees to get to the strip. worth it. finally got to see some of the cool stuff we didn't make it to last time. we gambled. we lost thirty bucks at roulette. then we ate lunch and went back to our hotel. hubby really wanted to play craps so i gave him seventy bucks and went to get some coffee and explore. when i came back, he had two hundred and sixty bucks! so i dragged him away and we went to a yummy buffet.

p.s. buffets were MADE for me. i can out-eat anybody, anytime, anywhere. definitely got my money's worth. and that made me happy because even though i want to drop a couple lbs, based on the weight i eat i should probably weigh a hundred pounds more than i do. so go me.

tuesday we woke up, ate breakfast, and headed home. i had felt icky all night so i was glad to get home, not so glad to be in the car for four to five hours. i did my school reading and the time flew. we made one pit stop. super gross bathroom but i had no choice. we make it home, and my eye is really itchy. i keep trying to scratch it but nothing helps. then it starts getting goopey. then i realize i have pink eye. i blame the nasty pit stop bathroom. had to miss school and work wednesday. boo.

but i'd still do it over again. why? because sometimes i forget how to "act my age" and be less responsible for a day or two. i wasn't going to go to vegas at all because i wanted to do some homework. but seriously, what twenty three year old turns down a free weekend in vegas with the hubby? and even though i may not party THAT hard, it is kinda a right of passage to come home from vegas with SOME kind of disease....mine just happens to be in my eye.

this weekend.

vegas. pinkeye. weight watchers. animal style fries. details to come.

growing up.

yes, i am technically an 'adult' and have been for a while. i can vote, join the army, smoke, drink, or buy a dirty movie if i so chose. i'm also married and living away from my family. those things, however, do not make me a 'grown up.' but today, i had an epiphany. i am, in fact, becoming one. and, i can prove it.

1. coffee choice: a year ago, i wouldn't have dreamed of ordering anything other than a big, blendy, calorie filled coffee beverage at the local coffee house. in the past few months, however, i've been drawn more and more to that ol' cup-a-joe in the morning- grown up style

2. shoes. gone are the days of comfy sneakers, light up sides and glow in the dark laces. somehow, i'm not sure how, but somehow they have been replaced by conservative and comfy high heel shoes.

3.pants. similar to the shoe quandary- someone, obviously a grown up, has replaced almost all my jeans with slacks, dresses, and skirts. curious indeed.

4. grocery shopping. last year, a trip to the store resulted in a cart full of easy mac, microwave taquitos, hungry man frozen dinners, those burritos in the purple wrapper that are always 'on sale' for like a quarter, soda, a industrial size bag of cereal, cookie dough, hot dogs, and maybe- if we felt extra special that week- hamburgers. when i went to the store this week, our cart was full of lean beef and chicken breasts, fruits, veggies, whole grain pasta and rice, multi grain breads, lowfat milk and cheese, green tea, and microwave taquitos (immature or not, those things were good!).

5. budgeting. when i was working at my first job, i remember getting a paycheck that was just over three hundred bucks and i thought i was the richest chick in all the land. i immediately bought a sink full of makeup and a juicy couture wallet. now, when i get a paycheck, three hundred bucks is mighty light, and almost all of it goes to bills and a saving account (who opened that? oh yeah. me. the grown up.)

it's kind of crazy to think how much i've matured. but when it starts to bum me out, i just pop in 'power rangers' on dvd, eat some microwave taquitos, paint my toes a hideously bright color and remind myself i still have plenty of growing left.

anniversary date.

i'm a wee bit late with these. my bad. our anniversary was perfect. we went to dowtown disney, which for anyone who doesn't know, is an outdoor shopping and restaurant area right outside of disneyland. we had a great meal and watched the fire works from the park and had a really great time.

this was particularly sweet of hubby to plan because we went on the same date for my birthday however my finicky film camera failed to capture a single moment. so i got a do-over with my christmas present!